Chair for the day Stuart welcomed our own Guest Spearer Trevor, & Tracey, to be inducted next week. Welcome back Ana.
The photos are here
The President’s Report was delivered by Deborah
with a little help in the background
(no - she hasn't turned into a snowman) click for details
- Christmas in July, 2nd at Clilli Cafe
- RYDA
- District Strategic Plan
- Warryn - performed a quick change surprise at Johnny Big Guys
Stuart - competition for us with Sunrise at Kings beach - plenty of liquid sunshine
Stuart introduced Trevor, who claimed the talk was “sprung on me”
Trevor’s story started in Swan Hill, Melbourne
University of Melbourne - became an accountant, but “selling jewellery” instead
University of Melbourne - became an accountant, but “selling jewellery” instead
Ended up a director at 23 in a market research company
Made a “fortune” but then went bankrupt
Got a job with the liquidators, “reconstructed”three companies, then bought a supermarket
Turned it around in 6 months
Round Australia with kids 6 & 4
Melbourne - Two companies in 10 years
Contract manager “back end” 2 years, 25m to $50m
12 years own company
2012 retired - plays with real estate
Divorced for 20 years, , son 38 in admin, daughter 36 psychologist
Helps Roger with lighthouses
The Voice - political campaign
“Right wing”, 3 month dole should be maximum, Politicians need KPIs
RC Nambour 6 months, STEMM. Trivia night, Westpac $10k, Nambour Community Centre
Farm at Doonan, then Woodford. Kings Beach Unit
Lucky with real estate - long leases add value
? Stuart - “right property in right place” Economy doesn’t matter
Sad for 30yo couple with mortgage
Nambour house - $200 to change light bulb
Darwin - tenant damaged - $8K legals, $6K paid back at $50/fortnight
Property needs to “stand out”
Sad for 30yo couple with mortgage
Nambour house - $200 to change light bulb
Darwin - tenant damaged - $8K legals, $6K paid back at $50/fortnight
Property needs to “stand out”
? Mark - fund raising
Mock interviews, donation tins in supermarkets
Discussed Golf Day, a “big” raffle
Mock interviews, donation tins in supermarkets
Discussed Golf Day, a “big” raffle
Stuart thanked Trevor - the “quiet ones” have the “best stories”
Accountability for politicians = elections
Heavy rail needed pre Olympics
Accountability for politicians = elections
Heavy rail needed pre Olympics
Directors
Mark - fundraising discussion at next Board meeting
Roger - working on Centaur Memorial design- maybe we can get it on the screen next week
Darryl - 5th Sept Vocational visit to WindanSea Community Clubhouse
Ejike/me told us that he would be moving to the AB’s place in Brisbane, then a holiday back in Nigeria to see his family, after that “where he is sent”
He will be sadly missed, but hopefully be able to visit occasionally.
All the best Ejike/me
He will be sadly missed, but hopefully be able to visit occasionally.
All the best Ejike/me
Sgt Richard
Thanked Chris for the donation of “his baby” a 100cc Suzuki which he has lovingly restored
1978 model with 11,000K on the clock
The ATO decides to audit Grandpa, and summons him to the ATO office. The ATO auditor was not surprised when Grandpa showed up with his lawyer.
The auditor said, “Well, sir, you have an extravagant lifestyle and no full-time employment, which you explain by saying that you win money gambling. I’m not sure the ATO finds that believable.”
“I’m a great gambler, and I can prove it,” says Grandpa. “How about a demonstration?”
The auditor thinks for a moment and says, “OK. Go ahead.”
Grandpa says, “I’ll bet you a thousand dollars that I can bite my own eye.”
The auditor thinks a moment and says, “It’s a bet.”
Grandpa removes his glass eye and bites it. The auditor’s jaw drops.
Grandpa says, “Now, I’ll bet you two thousand dollars that I can bite my other eye.”
The auditor can tell Grandpa isn’t blind, so he takes the bet.
Grandpa removes his dentures and bites his good eye.
The stunned auditor now realizes he has wagered and lost three grand, with Grandpa’s lawyer as a witness. He starts to get nervous.
“Want to go double or nothing?” Grandpa asks. “I’ll bet you six thousand dollars that I can stand on one side of your desk, and pee into that wastebasket on the other side, and never get a drop anywhere in between.”
The auditor, twice burned, is cautious now, but he looks carefully and decides there’s no way this old guy could possibly manage that stunt, so he agrees again.
Grandpa stands beside the desk and unzips his pants, but although he strains mightily, he can’t make the stream reach the wastebasket on the other side, so he pretty much urinates all over the auditor’s desk.
The auditor leaps with joy, realizing that he has just turned a major loss into a huge win.
But Grandpa’s lawyer moans and puts his head in his hands.
“Are you OK?” the auditor asks.
“Are you OK?” the auditor asks.
“Not really,” says the lawyer. “This morning, when Grandpa told me he’d been summoned for an audit, he bet me twenty-five thousand dollars that he could come in here and pee all over your desk and that you’d be happy about it.”
Don’t mess with old people!